Super Bowl Wasn't So Super

So, just like most of you, we watched the Super Bowl
this past Sunday night.

Ours hopes for another championship were as high
as an eagle's ass.

We got together, shared beers and tons of yummy morsels.

We cheered.
We laughed.
We high-fived.
We ate.
We yelled at a pet bird that kept on chirping.

It was your quintessential Super Bowl party.

The only thing that was missing was a victory for our
beloved Steelers.

But we lost.

So be it.

We are a proud group, we Steeler fans.

No doubt, victory would have been celebrated with great
ferocity and complete joy.

But we lost.

So be it.

We lost with class.

We wouldn't trade these last two weeks for anything.

It was like the holidays all over again around here.

People smiled a little easier.

We shared a common goal.

And for that, we are thankful.


So, without further ado, here is our take on the Super Bowl.


It started out with a Pittsburgh native effing up our
national anthem.

(The majority of us here would likely still schtoop her, if given
the chance.)


We then got scored on a bunch, and things looked bleak.


Then the Black Eyed Peas to the stage at halftime, and
things got even bleaker.

Ugh.

If you didn't already know, we loathe the Black Eyed Peas.

They stunk up the stage.

They only thing that could have saved the performance, would
have been a wardrobe malfunction, where the Chavez one
tore the breastplate off that Fergie dude.

We could seriously go on for days, but we'll spare you.

Until next week, when we're sure they'll do another performance
for something, cause they don't seem to turn down any gig
where they can make a buck, and dress like a-holes.

If Roger Goodell wasn't such a hardon, he would have booked
our man Keenan Cahill to rock the joint.




Editor's Note:
If you didn't watch that video, go back and do it now.


The Steelers started to play better.

We started getting our hopes up.


Then the best commercial of the night hit...

Our lives were changed forever.

That kid is epic.


So the game continued, and the Miller Lites kept on flowing.

We came close to having the biggest comeback victory in SB
history, but we all know it wasn't meant to be.

The game ended.

We packed up some leftovers.

Then went home, and swore off Sportscenter for at least
the next 8 days.

Even karaoke couldn't take away the pain we were
going through.


All in all, a memorable night with friends.

Nothing like your team being in the Super Bowl.

We'll take it every year.

Random Picture Monday (02-07-11)

Respect.

Super Bowl Week (Friday)

The game is Sunday.

The game is Sunday.

The game is Sunday.

The game is Sunday.

The game is Sunday.

The game is Sunday!


It got here fast, huh?

So yeah, the end of Super Bowl Week here at theNewk.com
has come and gone.

But we have one last surprise for you.

"Top Ten Reader Ed" sent us a super bowl poem, and he
even made an awesome graphic for it.

Don't believe us?

Get your popcorn ready...


-

'Twas the eve of the Super Bowl and all through STEELER Nation
Every STEELER fan poised for the grand celebration

The Terrible Towels were all set to be twirled
And the HERE WE GO STEELERS banners unfurled

The kiddies and older folks snug in their beds
As dreams of RING SEVEN danced in their heads

The countdown to kickoff so silently ticks
With me wearing #7 and her in 86

The buzz on the radio, web and TV
Say the STEELERS are underdogs, so let it be

We've been there and done that and triumphed before
We're destined to win, it'll show in the score

The players are confident, polished cold steel
Their hunger and eagerness hard to conceal

Big Ben has emerged from an ominous cloud
His performance will silence the nay-saying crowd

The opposing team's offense had better take care
Troy gives them fair warning to BEWARE THE HAIR

They say he plays dirty, but that's just not his style
There's proof in that patented Hines Ward sweet smile

And as if there weren't already enough to be feared
Bret Kiesel will intimidate with more than his beard

Better bring your own pillow for #92
James Harrison, The HIT MAN, is gonna hit YOU

Receivers aplenty to catch Big Ben's passes
Will have the defense thinking that they need glasses

To help out the STEELERS when they're in a pinch
The foot of Shaun Suisham to score is a cinch

And last but most definitely not the least
Coach Tomlin and staff are the breath of the beast

So bring on Super Bowl 45, please
Now, HERE WE GO STEELERS, let's shred some cheese

-

Epic.

Need we say more?

We really do have the best readers, and this proves it.

Thanks, Ed.
Thanks, Readers.
Thanks, Mr. Rooney.

Go Steelers.





(Steelers 31 - Packers 27)

Write that down.

Super Bowl Week (Thursday)

Back to the Steeler talk.

Yesterday we talked about Groundhog Day.

It was one of only 15 times the Phil didn't see his shadow, and
said we'd have an early spring.

The sun started shining, and everyone was happy.

Then the wind/cold/snow showed up, and tweeked us
on our stiff nip-nips.

Back to the frigid reality about where we actually live.


Okay now we're really going to talk about the Steelers now.

Oh, before we do that.

We got an email yesterday.

From the same email address that Frank the Stank
sends from.

But this author is named...

Edgar Allen Stank

-

Yo newk.

I rwote a poem in honor of the super bowl. you should post it
for your readers to enjoy.

in a couple days, will be the big game
after that day, this town will never be the same

the steelers will crush, and hurt em with each hit
i already hate cheeze, cause i really like to s#!t.

Do you get it? you kno cause cheese be pluggin you up. I be eatin lotsa
lettuce to keep my stuff moving. Thats what the docs at the clinic be
tellin me to do. they called it ruffage or something.

-

That's a masterwork.

Not so much the poem, but the lesson on staying regular.

Well done, Frank.

Err.. Edgar.

Think It'll Be An Early Spring?

"Winter, slumbering in the open air, wear on it's smiling
face a dream... of spring. Ciao."

"Ciao."


-
That's right, kids.

You guessed it...

It's Groundhog Day!

"Bing!"

Yeah, we love Groundhog Day.

We love the movie.
We love the event.
We love the idea of it all.
We love standing in a field, getting drunk.
We love Andie MacDowell's curly locks.

Will spring be here soon?

Or will this winter last forever?

We don't have the answer to that.

You should check an actual news source, like wpxi.com
or something.

And while you are there, tell Darieth Chisolm we
love her madly.

Seriously though, we have no idea if Phil saw his shadow.

We posted this at 4 something am.

We actually just took a whiz, and saw our shadow.

Does that count?

No?

Well forget you guys then.

We're going for a drive.

"Don't drive angry. Don't drive angry!"


Don't worry, we won't.



-

This is supposedly a Groundhog Day Word Search.

We can only find the word "woot."

Which is all we need.

Super Bowl Week (Tuesday)

Are you ready for this?

You better be, cause it's going down in 5 days.

Like we've said before...

Some things in this world are bigger than us.

The Steelers, in their 3rd super bowl in 6 years, qualifies
as not just big... but huge.

So this week, we won't talk about all the snow and ice we
got last night, and which will continue throughout today.

We won't talk about anything other than the Steelers.

The black and gold, and nothing else.

Get it?

Well, we may talk about Groundhog Day.

Or we may talk about our favorite TV shows or something.

Hell, we may even post an email if we get one.

But for now, this is our plan.

So prepare yourself.

Cause...

Here we go.

Random Picture Monday (01-31-11)

Peace to all in the Newk.

You Know This

We are all about the New Kensington/Arnold area
here at theNewk.com.

We try and keep you up to date with anything local that
we think you might give a squirt about.

It's not often that a story comes along, that is so HUGE,
we drop our local love for a day.

But it's Friday, and we ain't got no job...


But this story is huge.

Really huge.

Like ridiculously huge.

How huge?

This huge...



That's right people.

Hide yo kids, and hide yo wives.

The Hedgehog himself has his own brand of rum.

Dear lord.


This is some truly classy stuff.


Run out and get your bottle today.

And invite us over for a drink.

We promise to bring protection.

They Need To Know

Today is a good day.

We got an email from Frank the Stank.

It's more of a public service announcement.

Enjoy...


_

Yo newk

Some peeople ain't right. and here are sum things they need to know. First is they need to learn to drive when its slippy out. I was at Sheetz gettin some wraps then this dude almost ran me off da road by the stadium bar so I stopped in and got a 40 of mgd. Then I saw kids doin donuts in the valley lot and that ain't cool. Cause donuts is delicious and they deserve ur respect. not to be made fun of. And another thing is when you at the bar and a guy tells tha girl that they drink is too sweet, its cause they just want a free shot in it. I know whatsup.

One love
Frank the stank

_

Thanks to Frank, for dropping some winter time knowledge on us.

We are more than grateful.

Oooohh Ooohhh That Smell

It seems our neighbors in West Tarentum were dealing
with a smelly situation the other day.

And we are just the team to cover such a story, as things
tend get stinky from time to time here at theNewk.com
offices.

(Especially after Chili-Dog Thursdays during the summer months.)

So obviously we've seen, and smelled, our share of bad odors.

Just last July, our A/C unit was broken on a Friday afternoon
that reached the mid-90's in temps.

It's safe to say, many of us weren't allowed to walk into
our homes when we arrived at them, without
stripping down on the back porch first.

Let's get back to Tarentum...

So yeah, on Monday at around 5:30 pm, about 40 residents
were evacuated from their homes due to smelliness.

Weird thing was, the smells were in the homes.

Not outside the homes.

This had people confused.


After calling in different gas companies, to check
for gas leaks (hahaha... we know all about those), and any
other possible air quality issues.

They determined something must have been put into the sewers,
and should go away after they got flushed.

In our experience, a good flushing usually works on
stinky stuff.

The residents all returned to their homes later that night.

And all was once again well in West Tarentum.