Friday, April 30, 2010

All Good Things...

"All good things must come to an end."

Someone said that once, and we think it's crap.

If something is good, why should it end?

But if something were once good (or maybe you just
thought is was), and it comes to an end,
may have mixed feelings about it.

Maybe you are happy about it.
Maybe you are sad.
Maybe it's the change that bothers you.
Maybe you are excited about the fresh start.
Maybe you look back and say,
"What the eff?"
Maybe you were just kidding yourself.
Maybe you wished really hard that things were good.
Maybe you have something new to look forward to.
Maybe it's for the best.

Yeah, that last one is the one we're gonna go with.
(Even though we also ike the next to last one too.)

You may be asking yourself, "What the heck are
these fools blathering about?"

Well, there are many things around here that we could
be talking about.

But we are talking about Birthday Week.

Yeah, all that was for Birthday Week.

We had a blast this past year doing Wingapalooza,
marching in parades, taking pictures (Thanks DC),
making fun of stuff, talking to you all, being accepted
for once in our lives, getting asked out on dates by
random strangers, interviewing great people, making
videos, meeting some readers...and the list goes on
and on.

We look forward to year number two with much

For being such great readers and friends, here is an
insider's look into our office.

Daily Operations.

We don't know this guys name, but he makes this
cheesy chicken dip for pot luck lunches, so we keep
him around.

Frank the Stank's cube.

My cube.
(It's 100% secure from government technologies.)

Not too shabby, eh?

We also have one more J-Dub picture from last weekend
to share with you.
(May not be suitable for young eyes.)

Nic Cage took Birthday Week off, so we'll just tell you
the forecast.

Today will be awesome.
Saturday will be decent, but may get crappy.
Sunday will be like Saturday.

Oh yeah, we have some info to pass along!

The EKCC is having a Flea Market tomorrow!
Here are the details:
Saturday @ the EKCC from 8am-3pm
Kitchen open for cabbage and noodles, ham bbqs,
hot dogs and kraut.
It's gonna be awesome.

So get down there and support those ladies, cause
they rock very hard.

There you have it, folks.

Our first official Birthday Week.
It's been real, but we gotta get back to work.


Thursday, April 29, 2010

"You Promised A Lot..."

"You promised a lot..."

That's what someone said to us last night, and
they knew what they were talking about.

So let's get right to business.

We said yesterday that we'd explain some of
our icons and inside jokes.

Let's just start with the icons for now, okay?
We're busy too, you know.

Icon #1
Nic Cage/The Weatherman
We felt like doing a weather report once, and googled
for a picture. Nic Cage was smiling at us, so we just
went with it.

Icon #2
Snoop Dogg
We did a write up about a rumor that Snoop Dizzle was
going to do a show at the Ches-A-Rena last year sometime.
He then just kept stopping back during various other stories.
(Generally involving weed references.)

Icon #3
Lee Greenwood
The man wrote "God Bless The USA."
Do we need any other reasons?
But seriously, we are a patriotic group, and something
about that song, and Lee's left eye just does it for us.
He will always be our favorite icon.

Icon #4
Friends/Contributors to this site were going to Las Vegas,
and we needed something for them to take along. One of
those friends found this little guy, and slapped a Newk shirt
on him. They posed him in front of many great sites of
the city. He has since become a way for us to meet women.

Speaking of J-Dub, here are more pictures of him from
this past Saturday night...

Heading into the Vasta.

Dancing with some ladies at the Vasta.

Getting fresh with the ladies at the Vasta.

J-Dub keeps it legal.

J-Dub always makes the women crack a smile.

Thanks again for all the birthday wishes.

See you tomorrow.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Birthday Week Hump Day

We got lots of good feedback on J-dub.
(As usual)

So we are going to start today with more pictures
of his travels to Dormont.

Chillin' on the mean streets of Dormont.

Hot Dogs and Beer = Thug Life

J-Dub hanging out at the VF-Dub

J-Dub and friends.
(I <3 Biff shirts available today!)


Happy now?

So here's the deal.

Being it's our birthday week, we had stuff to do
this evening.

So we really aren't prepared for much today.

But never fear, as these next 2 days will be chocked
full of delicious morsels of awesomeness.

We will explain the mysteries of some Newk icons like:

Nic Cage (The Weatherman)
Lee Greenwood
Snoop Dogg
And any others we can think of by tomorrow.

So stay tuned.

And get off our case...

It's our birthday week.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

He's Baaaaa-aaack.

We know you all love J-Dub.

Why wouldn't you?

He is the baddest little dude this area has
ever seen.

Well, maybe Choppy with his winged hat,
may have
trumped J-Dub. But that's about it.

Back to our man.

He went out to celebrate our birthday this past
Saturday night.

Where did he go?

Back to Vegas?
Los Angeles?
South Beach?


He went to Dormont.

Because he's a party animal, and they were having
a Pub Crawl.

Here are some snapshots of J-Dub having the
time of his young life.

On his way to the first stop.

Getting settled in.

J-Dub seems to have a way with the ladies.

He's a lifetime member.

What did we tell you about his gigolo like ways?

Now, we will have many more pics of his night, coming
the rest of this week.

There are some doozies.

So keep checking in.

We have also received many great birthday emails, but
one in particular is getting published today.

Check this out!

...And Many More

Happy 1st Birthday theNewk!!

Admittedly I have not been with you since that first day. I think I started stopping by a day here and there, when you were about 3-months old. But then about a month later, I visited every Monday through Friday. Whether it was a shot of a street sign on Random Picture Mondays, a funny twist on a local news story, Wingapalooza, or a parade video, I was hooked.

You see, I was living out of the area and dealing with some personal struggles at the time. Seeing and hearing about my hometown somehow made me feel closer to my family and friends. Being 500 miles away, I came to appreciate having a little slice of home on a regular basis, plus there was the added bonus of your great sense of humor. Fast forward several months, and I have moved on from the personal struggles and am very near my family. One thing that has not changed is my devotion to theNewk.

Some of your readers may think that’s odd, and that’s fine! I’m sure everyone has his/her own stories and reasons for coming back to your site or being a fan on Facebook. Hopefully they’ll also send you some emails to share that with you.

I love what you guys are doing at theNewk. I look forward to celebrating many more Newk birthdays with you all.

Now go get some pizzas, wings and beers to honor this momentous occasion! Oh, and cake! Everyone needs cake and ice cream (or custard) to celebrate a birthday!

Happy Birthday theNewk!

Your Devoted Reader
Stuff like that blows us away.

Thank you so much.

And thanks to everyone else for sending in
amazing emails.

Everyone of them made us smile.

Monday, April 26, 2010

Birthday Week!

Exactly one year ago today, we started theNewk.

Here is what that first post said:
Welcome To theNEWK!

This is your one stop interweb place for all things concerning the New Kensington, Pa. and surrounding areas.

We will have everything from restaurant reviews to local events and personalities.

Check back daily and don't forget to tell your friends.

Just reading that magnificent post again, brings a little
tear to our eye.

C'mon now.

Go back and read it again, and ask yourself how did we
not win some sort of major award?

Luckily we don't need the gratification of material
awards and such.

Just a simple email from a reader or friend, is all
we need.

Or even when we get spotted at a local event and people
shout at us.

Which reminds us about something we've wanted
to talk about for some time now.

The pronunciation of our name.


We would prefer if people said 'the nuke.'

Now, much of this confusion falls on our shoulders.

See, early on in our site life, we would type our name
like this: theNewK

Which led many to believe that it was 'the New K.'

Which, it kind of is.
But that's not how we like to say it.

So just do what we want you to, and
we won't have
any problems, mmkay?

Now that we cleared that up, we can move on.

Here are some other things we'll be doing for
our birthday week:

We will explain some Newk icons and inside jokes.
We will post some birthday emails (keep em' coming).
J-Dub celebrated this past weekend, and we will
post pictures of his journeys.
We will explain the inner workings of our "office," and
maybe even reveal an identity of one of the crew.
We will talk about stuff in a witty and awesome way.

Y'all ready for this?

Friday, April 23, 2010


The Penguins lost in triple overtime.

We are in a terrible mood.

Get your weekend weather from Julie Bologna.

Oh yeah, yesterday's game answer is the Ninth St. Bridge.

Thanks for playing.
(All two of you)

Thursday, April 22, 2010

New Game!

So today we will try out a new game.

And this first one should be pretty easy.

How does the game work?

Oh, we're getting to that.
Settle yourself.

Every so often (when we have nothing to write about), we
will post a closeup picture of some recognizable item
from the area.

You then guess what it is.

What do you win?

Nothing right now.
Just the pride of being smarter than everyone else.

Let's give this a shot, shall we?

Post your guesses here, or on our facebook page.

Good luck.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

So You Wanna Be A Police Officer?

We here at theNewk get the New Kensington
Nixle updates.

And we got an interesting one this evening.

Check it out:
Community Message has been issued by the City of New Kensington.

Tuesday April 20, 2010 9:37 PM EDT

Accepting applications for the City of New Kensington Citizens Police Academy.

The city police department is accepting applications for the City of New Kensington Citizens Police Academy. The program is 6 months long (meeting every 2nd Wednesday of each month starting in May 2010).

Students will learn a variety of police related subjects.

Court System
DUI/Traffic Stops
Computer Crime
Drug/General Investigations
4th/5th Amendments
Use of Force/C.E.R.T (SWAT)
Crime Prevention

Requirements are you must be at least 18 years of age, be a city resident, and have no felonies. If you are interested in attending, please e-mail Officer Dino DiGiacobbe at: or call me and leave a message on my voice mail at: 724.339.7533 or 7534. Leave your full name and address with a contact number.

Applicants must fill out a registration form and sign a waiver permitting the police department to conduct a background check. Seats are limited and on a first come first serve basis. Deadline: April 23, 2010

Tell us that doesn't sound like a blast.

Go on, tell us!

Seriously though, we are really considering trying this out.

Even though we are a little older.

If we get a good group together, we could be like
Steve Guttenberg and the rest of the Police
Academy crew.

We can even trick Lt. Harris into going to the Blue Oyster.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

It's Official: Beer At Giant Eagle

So we stopped by the big bird the other day for
some Giant Eagle style sushi.

(Don't judge's not half bad.)

We noticed a glorious glow off to the right of us.

What could it be?

And before we even had time to answer our own internal
head question, we already knew the answer...

It's a beer cooler!

We ran over and stared through the glass like Ralphie
looking for the Red Ryder BB Gun in the window
of Higbee's Department Store.

They have so many awesome styles and flavors.

We found some Leinekugel's Summer Shandy that we've
been wanting to sample, and noticed they were
already sold out of their Sunset Wheat.
(One of our faves).

We seriously can't wait to go back and try a few other
delicious brews.

As they have over 150 different styles.

Maybe, instead of typing that last sentence, we could have
just showed you this picture?

Either way, we are rather stoked about this new place
to purchase one of our favorite items.

But know this, we will still buy beer at other local stores.

We have not forgotten about those that have served us
well, over these many years of consumption.

So Sam, Myrna, Stella, House of a 1,000 Beers...fear not.

You will still see our scruffy poonums on the regular.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Random Picture Monday (04-19-10)

Okay, now we're thirsty.

Friday, April 16, 2010

Friday Is A Great Day For Email

As many of you know, we often get emails
from our readers.

And every so often, one of those email
sticks out from the others.

Way out.

So here it is.


Hey NewK People,
My friends and me read your site all the time. Some of the stuff you say is really funny. We are wondering if you are hiring. Cause we want jobs where we can sit around and talk about New Ken. We have funny stuff to say to. So what do you think? Can we come work for you? We will bring donuts. You should really hire us cause we worked at long john silvers and only got fired because we ate all the hush puppies one night. We also think we would make good workers is cause we order pizza really good. And we like chicken wings to. Just like you guys. So email us back and let us know when we can start. k thnx.
-Frank the Stank
We would post our reply, but it's just filled with LJS
hush puppy envy.

And we are not proud of our jealousy.

Have a great weekend, folks.

Here is you Newk Weekend Weather Report:

"What in the hell is going on around here?"

Thursday, April 15, 2010

It's All About The Roosevelts, Baby

Word on the street is Roosevelt Park in Arnold won't
be opening at it's normal time this year.

It usually opens right after Memorial Day, but that may
be put off a few weeks until some upgrades can be

Seems they are putting up a new chain link around it.

They are also going to lay a new cement pad, and get
rid of some old trees before they fall on your kids.

Because nobody likes a park with smooshed children.

In other Arnold news:

Arnold officials are deciding what to do with an extra
$20,000 dollars in federal grant monies.

Here is our plan...

Finish up the work at Roosevelt.
Open that bad boy up.
Buy about 215 P&M pizzas.
Grab about 112 cases of cold brew from Sam's.
Get a to-go order of 176 dozen wings from Phillip's.
2,000 dilly bars from DQ.
Rent some lights.
Pay DJ Frankie some bucks.
And let's have a rockin' party.

What do you all think?

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

It's that time of year.

The time when large people start wearing
neon spandex shorts?


That's a week or two away.

The time we speak of, is hockey playoff season.


One of the coolest videos we've seen in a while, was made
right down the street at Plum High School.

You gotta check this out...

We loathe the Black Eyed Peas...

But we love Charlie.

Go Pens.
Do it.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

The Trouble With Hulton

So one of the bigger stories of note yesterday, was
that the Hulton Bridge in Oakmont would be
one lane.

Not only for yesterday, but also Tuesday
and Wednesday.

Between the hours of 9am to 2pm.

Normally, we wouldn't even mention this story.

But something seems off.

Maybe it's just us, but isn't that bridge always
one lane?

We get it, cars go both ways over that bridge everyday.

But that doesn't mean it's meant for that.

Don't you agree with us?

And on top of being too narrow...

It smells like butt.

The only thing that makes us even consider squeezing
over that bridge, is to get a Almond Torte Cake
from the Oakmont Bakery.
And we know what you're asking yourselves...

"Why, if you are coming from the Newk, would you
go around so you have to use the bridge? Why not
just go up Coxcomb?"

The reason for that is simple.

Going around, you can avoid that damn brick road.

Even if we just have to pass over it, it still ruins
our entire day.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Random Picture Monday (04-12-10)

Moons over my hammy.

Friday, April 9, 2010

The Newk Is Being Invaded By Aliens

You may have read about the nearby town of
Vandergrift, as being the main setting for a movie
being made by DreamWorks.

And on the other hand, maybe you didn't.

But here's what we know.

Some movie about teenage aliens is going to start
filming in our area very soon.No, not those alien teenagers.

As we said before, The Grift will be the main backdrop.

But they also are thinking about shooting here in
New Ken, as well as Hyde Park.

They were talking about how the architecture of Vandy
was the reason, but we aren't dumb.

We know they want to film there because one of our
favorite eating spots resides there...

G&G Restaurant
(Our first restaurant review)

Here is your Newk Weekend Weather Report:

"One of these things is not like the others."

Thursday, April 8, 2010

What Makes This Place Home?

Hey everyone!

Happy Thursday to you all.

Why are we in such a good mood?

Because we got an awesome email to post.

That's why.

I have two brothers, both of which moved out-of-state years ago. One just came back up over Easter weekend for a visit, with plans to move back to the area (western Pennsylvania) in a few months. He and my sister-in-law have a new baby, and want to be closer to the new grandparents. The other brother left home years ago and never looked back. He visits very rarely and can’t wait to get out as soon as he arrives. I barely know his kids at all.

This got me to thinking...I’ve heard of a lot of people, old and young, who leave town then boomerang back to western Pennsylvania again to put down their roots. My parents live in the same house they bought in 1967, five minutes from each of their parents’ houses. I’ve lived all over the Pittsburgh area, but never out-of-state.

What makes some stay, some flee, and some return later? I’m interested in hearing from all Newk readers on the subject...those who left, those who stayed, those who are happy or unhappy with their decisions. What makes this place home? What makes it special? What makes it toxic? What kept you? What drove you away? If money was no object, would your decisions change?

Since the Newk’s readers are all above-average intelligence, I look forward to your answers.

Seriously, we here would also like to hear your

So leave them here.
Post em' on facebook.
Email us.


Just do it.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Wash Your Rims, And Your Dog

Area residents can now wash their car, and their
pooch at the same place.

Their driveway.

No seriously.

If dog owners want to give Barkley a sudsy bath, they
can now pay $8 at their local self-serve car wash.

The Aqua Jet Express in Lower Burrell has a dog
wash station, featuring many different hypoallergenic
doggy shampoos.

They also have a dryer and a pet vacuum.


Long gone are the days of tossing Sparky into the
bathtub and having him slip around while you are kneeling
on a folded up towel.

Just walk Cujo up the ramp and into the waist-high tub.

The one thing that could be tough, is doing everything
in the allotted 8 minute window you get.

8 minutes sounds like a long time.

But when Lucy feels like wiggling around, and not letting
you get at her under belly, those seconds start to
tick by rather quickly.

So good luck, if you decide to give this a shot.

And just so you know, this is the Aqua Jet at the bottom
of Coxcomb, where the Parnassus Freeway ends.

We don't know how that's considered "Lower Burrell,"
but whatev.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Rough Roads And Waterlines

This has been the view of Seventh Street Road between
Sheetz and the former Co-Go's for some time now.

They have been putting in some fancy pants 12-inch
waterline along the curb.
To the dismay of many loyal Stadium Bar patrons.

(Much respect to the Stadium folks, as we wouldn't
want to cross any of you. We do not get religious here...
but bless all of you, by whomever it is you believe in.)

Whew, that was a close one.

Okay, so they plan to pave that stretch of road this May.

Not the entire stretch, just half of it.

That's right, from the curb to the center line.

So if you are heading into the downtown area, sorry
about your luck.

Bumpy roads for you.

They will also be repaving Constitution Blvd, after a
super fancy pants 16-inch waterline was put in there.
Probably not the whole thing, but like half of it for a
few blocks, and the entire thing for a few blocks.

You know, all willy-nilly.

Some other lines on some other roads have also
been replaced, and the roads need repaving as well.

But we don't drive on those as much, and we have only
so much "care" around here to spare.

So get ready for some orange cones in the Newk.

As if we really needed to warn you about orange
cones coming once Spring has sprung.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Random Picture Monday (04-05-10)

Who is Ed?

Friday, April 2, 2010

Nothing Going On But The Weather


There still isn't anything news worthy around here.

We don't know how the VND does it.

Actually, we do.

Cause there ain't crap in there worth reading either.

So anyways, the weather is the one thing of note
coming up this weekend.

It's beautiful out there.

We washed our car.
Cleaned up doggy doo.
Cut the grass.
Got some Glen's.
Hit some golf balls.
Ate some lunch.
Took out the trash.

Okay, so we only did 2 of those things.
But we thought about doing them all.

So here we are.

It's Friday, and we are talking about weather.

Help us people!

Are there any awesome events going on this weekend
that we should be aware of.

Good bands playing?


We are frustrated, so we're gonna hand things over
to Nic, and we'll see you next week.

Here is your Newk Weekend Weather Report:

"Things are looking bright."

Even Mr. Cage was boring today.
Please forgive us.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Great Area, Better People

So the longer we've done this site, the more
opportunities we've had to meet some amazing
people from this area.

People we probably would have never met,
had we not decided to start this thing.

And that is something that makes doing this
site 5 days a week worthwhile.

Recently, we have met some outstanding folks.

People with great stories.
People with positive attitudes.
People that made us laugh.
People with great ideas.
People with great taste in dining.
Generous people.
Genuine people.
Caring people.

Fact is, some of us here (me particularly) have been
going through some rough times as of late.

And meeting people like the ones mentioned above,
has given me hope and put a smile on my face.

By no means am I taking anything away from the people
in my world that have always been there for me, and
continue to be there for me.

I'm just making a point that there is something about
this area, maybe something in the water, that makes
people around here so awesome.

These people are what makes this area what it is...


Sure we have our share of problems.

But we also have many bright spots.

And all we try to do here is point out some of those things.

The things to be enjoyed.

We want to talk about the good stuff, that maybe gets
passed over, or we take for granted.

I for one, take none of you for granted.

So for being so good to us, we'd like to give you a
little gift.

Well, it's not that little...

(No April Fools, either. We are dead serious.)